With the remaining Republican presidential nominees competing in 10 states for 437 delegates on Super Tuesday this week, here are 9 burgers inspired by the 4 remaining contenders (Rick Santorum, Mitt Romney, Ron Paul and Newt Gingrich) plus 3 favorites who have dropped out of the race (Herman Cain, Rick Perry and Michelle Bachmann). Why 9 burgers for 7 candidates? Newt gets 3.
Check them out! Then VOTE for your favorite (or least favorite) in the comments below!
1. Rick Santorum: "The Family Values Burger"
All-Beef Burger, Totally-Not-Gay Special Rainbow Sauce, Fairy Sprinkles on a Bun
We all know how Ricky feels about the gays, which is why I created this completely family- and kid-friendly burger, perfect for you're whole family to enjoy! You'll taste the sanctity of traditional marriage in every bite!
2. Mitt Romney: "The $10,000 Burger"
Premium American Wagyu Beef Burger, New England Aged Cheddar, Black Truffel, Elitist Massachusetts Greens on a Brioche Bun
A burger this luxurious only seemed appropriate for the former business executive. And as long as we're all protected under Romney-Care, why not have two?
3. Newt Gingrich: "The Open Relationship Burgers"
All-Beef Burger and Marshmallow Fluff on a Bun A burger this luxurious only seemed appropriate for the former business executive. And as long as we're all protected under Romney-Care, why not have two?
3. Newt Gingrich: "The Open Relationship Burgers"
All-Beef Burger with Mayo and Ketchup, All-Beef Cheese Burger, All-Beef Bacon Burger
Why have just one burger when you can have three at once? That's why I made three nice and plump burgers for Mr. Gingrich. I think he'll like them so much he'll want to marry all three!
4. Ron Paul: "The Slim Burger"
Turkey Burger and Lettuce on a Bun
Ron Paul wants a slimmer government, so I created a slimmer burger. And let's be honest, this burger is about as exciting as the Paul campaign gets.
5. Herman Cain: "The 999 Burger"
Mr. Cain's 999 tax plan was a whole lot of fluff, which is why I topped this burger with fluff in marshmallow form. How much do I actually want to eat this burger? About as much as I'd like to imagine this former pizza executive as Commander in Chief.
Angus Steak Burger, Texas BBQ Sauce, Pickles on a Bun
A big ol' Texas burger for Mr. Perry complete with Texas raised Angus Steak, Texas BBQ sauce, pickles, and - wait there's one more ingredient - oh, I can't remember.
7. Michelle Bachmann: "The I-Love-America Burger"
100% American Raised Beef Burger, American Cheese, Lettuce, Tomato, Onion with Freedom Fries and a Glass of Iced Tea (Party)
Michelle Bachmann is one All-American woman, which is why I made this oh-so-American burger served with USA Freedom Fries and a refreshing glass of iced tea (party).
VOTE for your favorite (or least favorite) in the comments below!
And in case you were wondering what marshmallow fluff on a burger looks like after an hour...
***You might like: Oscar Dogs: 9 Hot Dogs Inspired by the Oscar Nominees for Best Film!***
